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Feeling: Calm. Loving my life. |
Eating: Um... life?
Wearing: Jeans, black tank top with built in bra, lavender panties, eith a little sleeping kitty on them, my claddagh, green choker and matching earrings, contacts, vestiges of the day's make-up, black belt.
Listening to: *Hummmmrumblerumblerumble* It's my washing machione making contented noises.
Chatting with: Keeping my own counsel.
Thinking: "I need to concentrate on my posture more."
Remembering: Dave's tongue ring.
Glad for: My ability to move past fear into growth.
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Today is: 2002-04-02 - @ 5:02 p.m.
chasing amy all time - is relative
I love you. I love you and not in a friendly way, although I think weíre great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy dog way. Although Iím sure thatís what youíll call it. I love you. Vrey, very simple. Very truly. You are the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option that you would ever consider. I had to say it, I just canít take this anymore. I canít stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I canít look into your eyes withuot feeling that longing that you only read about in trashy romance novels. I canít talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are and I know this will probably queer our friendship, no pun intended. But I had to say it. Because Iíve never felt this way before and I donít care, I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we canít hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But god, I just couldnít allow another day to go by without getting this out there. Regardless of the outcome. Which, by the look on your face, is to be the inevitable shoot down and you know, Iíll accept that. But I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment. And if there is a moment of hesitation then that means that you feel something to. And all I ask, please, is that just you not dismiss that and try and dwell in that for just 10 seconds. Alyssa, there isnít another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I am with you. I would risk this freindship for the chance to take it to the next plateau because it is there between you and me. You canít deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what youíve meant to me. Which, well I do appreciate it, Iíd never need a painting of birds spotted at a dinner to remind me of.
- Holden from Chasing Amy
*Sigh* It took me forever to type that, and I proabably got it wrong, but I needed an entry to cover up the one I made earlier today
all time - is relative